Christmas is Back

Published on November 10, 2006 in Change Mgmt. 0 Comments

Three of the biggest retailers have found that eliminating or de-emphasizing Christmas may have hurt sales. You may remember last year when they were very Grinch-like and removed any reference to Christmas from advertising and stores. Employees were barred from exclaiming “Merry Christmas” and had to substitute “Happy Holidays” instead.

But, sales were weaker at these stores. Therefore, the three have major campaigns to label seasonal merchandise as “Christmas” and not “Holiday”. Merry Christmas to Macy’s. Kohl’s and Wal-Mart. May your sales increase for acknowledging centuries of tradition.

3 Minute Management Course

Published on August 26, 2006 in Business. 0 Comments Tags: , .

Well I guess email spam isn’t all bad. Take for instance this 3 minute management course:

Lesson One
An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing.
A small rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, “Can I also sit like you and do nothing?”
The eagle answered: “Sure, why not.” So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle and rested.
All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.

Management Lesson #1
- To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.
____________________________________

Lesson Two
A turkey was chatting with a bull. “I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree,” sighed the turkey, “but I haven’t got the energy.”
“Well, why don’t you nibble on some of my droppings?” replied the bull. “They’re packed with nutrients.”
The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, and found it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch.
Finally after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly perched at the top of the tree. He was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot him out of the tree.

Management Lesson #2
- Bullshit might get you to the top, but it won’t keep you there.
_____________________________________

Lesson Three
A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold; the bird froze and fell to the ground into a large field. While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him.

As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was. The dung was actually thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him.

Management Lesson #3
(1) Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy.
(2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend.
(3) And when you’re in deep shit, it’s best to keep your mouth shut!

This ends your three-minute management course :-)

State of the Blogosphere

Published on August 19, 2006 in Business. 0 Comments

Did you know that there are now 50 million blogs? That 175,000 blogs are started every day? That 7,200 are created every hour? A very interesting article about blogging, State of the Blogosphere. So many to read, so little time.

Start your own hedge fund

Published on August 11, 2006 in Musings. 0 Comments

If you’re an equities trader like me, you must hear a lot about hedge funds…big returns, lots of money, set for life. So why not start your own? How hard could it be?

Could this be indicative of a hedge fund bubble? Last year 1,000 or so funds went belly-up. But around 2,100 new ones started, bringing the grand total to over 8,000, up from 600 ten years ago. (At press-time there were 6,010 Taco Bells in the U.S. Just FYI.) One curmudgeon by the coffee urn muttered that it reminded him of 1990s-era day-trading seminars. Booya to you, mister!

Where are the CIO’s?

Published on August 11, 2006 in Business. 0 Comments Tags: .

Good article at CIO Insight that makes you think: Why Business Schools Aren’t Turning Out Good CIO Candidates.

Most of my CIO friends and clients these days are business managers who currently happen to manage IT, rather than career technologists who have ascended to the role, a trend I have seen accelerate over the past ten years.

Business Advisor Online

Published on June 19, 2006 in Business. 0 Comments Tags: , .

Here is an info-packed site for those of you starting, operating and/or closing a small business: Business Advisor Online. You can find industry-specific information in Retail, Manufacturing/ Construction, Services, Wholesale/Distribution and Professional Services.

A quick review of the Business Advisor Online Site shows that you can easily access hundreds of high quality Articles, White Papers, and Business Management Tools, as well as links directly to relevant information on other sites. Each of these has a brief summary letting you know what to expect and every article is rated in several different ways to tell you what type of information it contains.

When I stared browsing the white papers, I lost track of time and started searching different keyword combinations to see what would come up. And wouldn’t you know it, I came across information I could use. Any site that gives me actionable new information is okay by me. As a point of disclosure, several of my own whitepapers are on the site.

Make House Calls

Published on May 16, 2006 in Business. Closed

Potential clients feel more comfortable in their offices than in my office, no matter how plush. So it is a good idea to meet them in their office whenever possible. When meeting anywhere else, they tend not to reveal their whole hand.

I understand why some consultants prefer to meet in their own offices -— it increases efficiency. But what I lose in efficiency, I gain in trust and strong connections. I also get to speak to all managers, executives and some employees if necessary — something that does not always happen if I were holding meetings in my office. If others in the organization see me in action and give positive reports to the owner or other person-in-charge, I have a better chance of acquiring them as a client down the road because they trust me.

Brochures and newsletters don’t breed trust -— communication and performance do. The last thing I want my clients saying about their business strategy to their peers is that they have no idea what’s going on. These people are my ambassadors. That’s why I make my clients listen to my whole spiel so that all of us can sleep better at night knowing we’re on the same page.

Safety….and humor

Published on May 3, 2006 in Musings. 0 Comments Tags: .

Qantas is the safest major airline. Maintenance is the key. Apparently, after every flight, Qantas pilots fill out a form, called a “gripe sheet”, which tells mechanics about problems with the aircraft. The mechanics correct the problems, document their repairs on the form, and then pilots review the gripe sheets before the next flight.

And it seems that a sense of humor permeates the entire organization. Here are some actual maintenance complaints submitted by Qantas’ Pilots and the solutions recorded by maintenance engineers.

Pilots: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
Engineers: Almost replaced left inside main tire.

Pilots: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.
Engineers: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft

Pilots: Something loose in cockpit.
Engineers: Something tightened in cockpit.

Pilots: Dead bugs on windshield.
Engineers: Live bugs on back-order.

Pilots: Number 3 engine missing.
Engineers: Engine found on right wing after brief search.

Pilots: Aircraft handles funny.
Engineers: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.

Pilots: Target radar hums
Engineers: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.

Pilots: Mouse in cockpit.
Engineers: Cat installed.

Pilot:. Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget pounding on something with a hammer.
Engineers: Took hammer away from midget

What! No Website?

Published on April 5, 2006 in Technology. 0 Comments Tags: .

Back in 1995 I put up my first web page for the consulting company I was working at. The web was fairly new and there was relatively little traffic. What I remember most is one of my clients saying. “What the hell would you use that for?” My explanation at that time was, “It’s advertising.”

Within five years that client had their own web page (yes I did it) and put their materials catalog and service descriptions online. These days, if you don’t have a website, and even worse, an e-mail address, you are a non-entity. From a one-man contractor to a worldwide conglomerate, you need the resources. So I find it unusual to find businesses without either. I still hear, “This web thing, it’s just a fad!” And this I don’t get at all.

Then after you get a website, all I hear is “How do I know who’s visiting?” If you ask, your website is not doing its thing. And, Here’s 50 Reasons more people aren’t using your website.

Are You Happy?

Published on February 7, 2006 in Change Mgmt. 0 Comments

There’s some surprises in the Salary.com 2005/2006 Employee Satisfaction and Retention Survey between what employees value and what HR professionals perceive to be important to employee job satisfaction. Many of us are at increased risk of losing our most valuable and productive employees.

HR professionals list the top factors of employee happiness as: Adequate Benefits, Friendly Co-workers and Fair Compensation, in that order. However, dissatisfied employees cite inadequate compensation, no opportunities for advancement, and no recognition for their work as the top three reasons for leaving.

The report states that turnover costs you 30% of the replaced person’s salary, but half of dissatisfied employees say they would stay another year for as little as 15 percent more in base salary.